I Know It’s Not Halloween, But Here’s My Nightmare Hair Experience
After deciding that it was time to get some new-hair-new-life action, I decided to try out a new hair stylist. It was a disaster.
During the six hours in which I was basically held hair-hostage, there were several red flags that, if I’d been paying more attention, could have caused me to pause, get up, and walk away, possibly saving myself from this blue horror show that is my hair right now. But I didn’t listen. Why didn’t I listen??
Red Flag #1: Said “Remind me what we’re doing again?”
She says, moments after I sit in the chair. And I’m like, okay, hold up—you’re telling me you didn’t even glance over the notes you supposedly took during our consultation a week ago? Like…That was sort of why I had the consultation.
Red Flag #2: Said “You’re in the best hands in this shop.”
Hmmm… A bit cocky, don’t you think? It’s kind of like when you’re dating a guy—either that’s a really good sign, or an obvious douchebag sign-post saying, “I’m not like other guys.” And for the record, he’s exactly like other guys.
Red Flag #3: Said “I forgot to take into account the color in your hair.”
She says, after she’s bleached half of it. I’m sorry—what? You forgot to remember… the color of my hair? You mean, the color that you’re supposed to be… re-coloring?
Shoot me in the face. Just shoot me.
Red Flag #4: Said “Oh, yeah…I’d feel wrong letting you leave the store like this.”
As she hovered over me, staring at my reflection in the mirror, she’d asked me whether or not I thought she should re-bleach, to which of course I’d responded, “Um, yeah,” my eyes lingering on the single stripe of brassy yellow cutting around the circumference of my head through the otherwise white-blonde.
And that was when she was like, “Oh, yeah, I’d feel wrong…”
You’d feel “wrong”? Then why is the subject up for debate? Are you the professional I’m paying $215, or are you not the professional I’m paying $215?
Red Flag #5: Your hair reminds you of a Monet painting…
Start asking some serious questions. Whether it’s your color or your shadow roots. Take a moment to yourself. Get a friend to come and give you some advice. Choppiness in hair color is not the business. Start taking the process into your own hands, for goodness sake.
I didn’t. I just sat there and trusted her, because I figured, what the hell do I know about the hair coloring process? But the thing is, we know a lot—a lot—about how hair should look. If you’re above 20 years old and get your hair done on a regular basis, TRUST YOUR INSTINCTS.
So my hair, which was supposed to look something like this:
Ended up looking like this:
Beauty can be a beast. Hopefully, this experience can educate you as much as it has me. Follow me on Instagram to see how I fixed this hair disaster of mine!