The WORST Makeup Product Names: A Cringe-Worthy Round-Up

The WORST Makeup Product Names: A Cringe-Worthy Round-Up

Not to toot my own horn, but I always felt that I was great at naming things (though, to play devil's advocate, I did choose the name "lovelierie", which people seem to have a hard time with so maybe I'm not such a fab name-selector after all). 

Do you know why? Because I am super, super critical and, as such, feel pretty confident that I would be able to steer clear of horrifically offensive monikers. 

Apparently, though, there are plenty of gainfully employed awful-product-name-dubbers out there, judging by the amount of "are-you-serious-right-now?"-status beauty buy names that I come across on a regular basis. 

Here are five that keep my eyes rolling.

1. Urban Decay's Afterdark Palette; "Druggie"

Urban Decay's Afterdark Palette

Urban Decay's Afterdark Palette

The good news is that this palettes seems to have been pulled. Not a shocking revelation, considering the amount of well-deserved backlash the company/Sephora received for thinking that it was A-okay to call a shade, "druggie".

Oh and what made the name choice even worse was the fact that the vibe of the entire palette was basically "sexy" vices. Um...

2. Maybelline's "Raging Raisin" Lipstick

Maybelline's "Raging Raisin" Lipstick ( ≈ $7.49)

Maybelline's "Raging Raisin" Lipstick ≈ $7.49)

Okay, in the grand scheme of things, this isn't THAT bad. It's not racist or sexist or outright offensive. But it is just so bizarre. Isn't it?

Especially when you compare it to the rest of the shades in this collection (i.e. "Sapphire Siren", "Midnight Merlot", "Wickedly White", etc.). One of these things is not like the other...

3. Cheeky Monkey's "Blue Room Ball Buster"/"Camel Toe"/"Full Brazilian" Nail Polish

I always want to root for indie brands. I really do! And I get that the names here are meant to be in good fun/pun-y. But I simply cannot co-sign these. And there are more where these came from. Boo.

4. theBalm's"The Manizer Sisters" Palette

I am sorry, I just find this whole campaign SO idiotic. Three sisters are found "guilty of being gorgeous". So, yes, there is a lot of jail-ish themes going on in the packaging. Nothing sexier than attractive criminals who are locked up for their looks, huh?

Bummer though, because I actually love the idea behind this palette and theBalm usually excels when it comes to cornering kitschy, cute concepts.

5.  NARS' Orgasm Blush In "Deep Throat"

Obviously, this is  a cult classic. But I'm still mad at it because I feel like this "edgy" name gives fuel to the cosmetic crowd who feel like EVERYTHING about makeup has to be tongue-in-cheek/"oh-la-la". And referencing sex doesn't automatically make something cool.

You can't just slap on a sex reference and be like "well, my work here is done, we did it, guys!". I mean, you can but it's lame (see also "Indecent Proposal") ". Try harder!

Also, another new gem from NARS is "Playpen". PLAYPEN. Maybe I just have babies on the brain these days, but I found this an odd one. Just me? Probably.

Okay, I'm sure there are SO many others out there. Come yell about them with me on Twitter and Instagram.

Beauty Dip: 1/14-1/21

Beauty Dip: 1/14-1/21

Zig Zag Crimping: Not Nearly As "Nineties" As It Sounds

Zig Zag Crimping: Not Nearly As "Nineties" As It Sounds